Oppose the War: You Must Be Out of Work!

My father has been forwarding every e-mail he is sent supporting the war, and containing stories of some unwashed anti-war protrester getting a can of Shut-Up opened on him by someone whose brother died in France (those ungrateful wretches!), etc. I was finally compelled to send this reply:

Here’s a story you can also forward to everyone on your list. You do forward them, don’t you, or do you actually agree with everything you send on?

Anyway, I know this one is true, because it happened to me! Continue reading “Oppose the War: You Must Be Out of Work!”

Additional Laws of Cartoon Physics

This was based on a humorous piece passed around the Internet many years ago. Despite its topicality, no one has really bothered to add to it.
Percussive Reprocessing
Any organic entity (animal or plant), when struck with sufficient force, will be knocked out of the top of the frame, and return to earth as finished goods, ready for immediate use or sale. Continue reading “Additional Laws of Cartoon Physics”

A Poem for Pop-Corn Days

Schaller, Iowa Pop Corn Days 2002
The Jaycees Beer Garden

A local band blangs away
  from a flatbed stage
In a beer garden walled
  by semitrailers

The singer channels the Foo Fighters
  like him, we’re “Lookin’ for the sky to save me,
   “Lookin’ for a sign of life”

In front of the stage
 a young mother “dances” with her daughter.
She’s wearing a tank top and not-quite-Daisy-Dukes
 so is the three-year old
Clinging tight to Mom’s hip.

Everyone is back in high school.